This post originally appeared here on Medium.
Quit Trying To Get Your Life Back Into Balance
Everyone is striving towards maintaining a well-balanced life. But what if there is no such thing as a balanced life?
What does balance mean? The dictionary defines balance as an even distribution of weight, enabling someone or something to remain upright without falling over. It is about maintaining your center. A balanced life means the ability to enjoy success equally in career, relationships, health, and every other area of your life. In short, it means having it all.
Is it realistic to expect a balanced life?
Everything in my life requires a part of me — career, family, friends, hobby, and health. Don’t forget, while all those aspects are a part of self, having time for self does not mean working, spending time with friends and family, or working out.
For me, time for self means savoring a cup of coffee in the morning, taking a walk in the park, an afternoon nap, or meditation. It is engaging in activities that will boost my well-being without the involvement of other people.
Life is all about choices, and they are relentless. Every decision to prioritize one aspect means you are compromising on other areas. If you are truly serious about success, you cannot expect to spend an equal amount of time socializing with friends. If your family is important to you, you can’t expect to make it big in your career at the same time with equal contribution and still have quality time set aside. That will never happen.
Whichever areas you choose to prioritize, you are sacrificing others. Where you invest most of your time will provide you with the best returns.
— Purposefullifenow.com
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Photo by Ithalu Dominguez from Pexels
In the beginning, you may need to put in more than you can bargain. When your career takes off, it is hardly time to slow down. When you have tasted the sweet nectar of success, you won’t want to stop.
If you have a fitness goal but refuse to cut down your social time with friends, it’s unlikely you will ever come close, let alone achieve your goals. Do you invest quality time in your relationships, or are you satisfied they exist in the background?
Whichever areas you choose to prioritize, you are sacrificing others. Where you invest most of your time will provide you with the best returns. The question to ask is which areas are you willing to sacrifice to get what you want.
We hit multiple crossroads along our journey. Life forces us to choose either way. If we refuse to decide, we will end up with regrets about choices we didn’t make.
No one likes to compromise. You give in to a decision but secretly feel angry and resentful of those you have to give up. Regardless of what you want to pursue in life, you will soon discover it’s not possible to have everything. By unrealistically holding on to hope, you fool yourself into believing you can achieve a balanced life.
If I’m living a balanced life, I will end up being mediocre, just good enough to get by, but not very far. Nothing spectacular happens in the middle.
— Purposefullifenow.com
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Photo by Ithalu Dominguez from Pexels
To be exceptional in any area, you need to put in time and effort. The time you invest in different aspects varies. It’s not possible to have everything spread across because you will need to forgo certain areas. You only have so much time in a day, so decide your priorities.
I’m a firm believer that I should fill my cup first before I can effectively be of service to others. By that, I mean family, friends, and work. How much time can I set aside every day for self-nurturing?
Can I afford to sit for an hour or two in the morning savoring my coffee, maybe read a book to feed my brain? Do I have time to take a walk in the park to connect with nature so I can be more alert, calm, and creative to tackle the day ahead? I can’t run my day effectively if I’m feeling foggy and my brain keeps shutting down on me.
That is why creating a balanced life is an illusion.
If I’m living a balanced life, I will end up being mediocre, just good enough to get by, but not very far. Nothing spectacular happens in the middle.
Original Photo by Naveen Annam from Pexels
Success lies on either side of the extreme. Without conscious decisions, I will wander through life aimlessly in frustration.
At some point, we need to accept that it’s okay not to have the complete happiness package. We set some areas aside so we can give time to what matters most. Is it going to be our dreams, relationships, health, and fitness, or ourselves?
In pursuit of a meaningful life, it’s worthwhile to remember that time does not stop for anyone. Kids will grow. Health will deteriorate. Wealth may not remain on the top rung of the ladder as we grow older. Not everything in life is replaceable. Almost everything requires time and patience to nurture and to grow.
While tomorrow may present new opportunities to begin anew, sometimes we might require to start over in the inconvenience of less than favorable circumstances. Be mindful of our choices. We have a lifetime to plan for the future, but we don’t have forever.
Let us be okay with the fact that we can’t have everything. Instead, we can start focusing on what we believe is right for us.
Never fail to appreciate the blessings we already have. Life will be so much happier and meaningful when we finally learn to live in acceptance.
