This post originally appeared here in Change Your Mind Change Your Life.
You're Only One Choice Away From A Happily Ever After
While a lot of things in life may be beyond your control, there is however one area that is completely your responsibility.
You need to understand that this one thing plays the primary role in determining the outcome of your life.
Life doesn’t just happen. It is defined by the choices you make, every single day.
Everything begins with a decision. The path you travel, the level of your success, how happy you are in life, and how much money you make are all choices determined by you.
It is still true that you alone cannot control everything that happens out there, but you have the choice to decide if you’d stay as a victim or rescue yourself from the trap of despair. Even if you chose not to choose, you still had made a choice.
There is no such thing as absolutely anything, it’s only how you perceive it to be. You decide how you’re going to interpret any situation. You have the power over how you react when things don’t turn out the way you expect it.
The next thought, the next comment, the next activity, or plan are all choices made by you. Either you make those choices yourself, or you allow someone else to dictate your path. You develop according to the choices that guide or influence your life. Your choices determine your experience.
You’re given the power to create your experience through your choices, and unless you take full responsibility, you lost control over your life. If you believe that outside forces are responsible for your outcome, you are giving your power away.
Think about your life as a story. Who wrote it? Did you play a part in creating the reality you are living now or did you just go along with the choices of others? Are you happy with the result? If not, then what are you going to do about it?
Every decision has a consequence. How your life turns out today results from the choices you made before. Don’t blame yourself if you have unconsciously made a poor decision in the past. Sometimes we lose our way. We all make mistakes. We all fail. That’s what makes life interesting.
Instead of drowning in regret, remorse, and guilt, identify ways to overcome your feelings. Every moment is an opportunity to make progress. There is really no reason to suffer unnecessarily.
You may perceive what you’re experiencing to be true. But that may not be the fact. That’s just how it appears to you. And your perception will guide your actions. You close your mind to every available possibility and sometimes even the truth if you’re not willing to be flexible.
Happiness is just as simple as altering your view about life and learning to see things from a different perspective. We have no control over how an event will turn out, so it helps to have an open mind. Blaming is never helpful.
Decisions. We can think about things, turn them over in our minds a million times, play out possible scenarios, but really when it comes down to it, you have to go with your heart and move forward. Maybe things will go well. Maybe they’ll turn out poorly. Every decision brings with it some good, some bad, some lessons, and some luck. The only thing that’s for sure is that indecision steals many years from many people who wind up wishing they’d just had the courage to leap. — Doe Zantamata
Because of our brain’s negative bias, we’re most likely to notice the bad qualities instead of the good ones, things that worry or annoy us or make us critical. If you’re constantly surrounded by negativity, you’ll naturally feel less supported, less safe, and less inclined to go after the life that you want.
You’re looking at the world through the lens of impossibility and frustrations, and that’s where you will live.
When you understand that you live within your choices, suddenly everything is within your grasp. You can choose happy thoughts. You can choose to be optimistic. You can choose to forgive and let go of bitterness. Change your focus and look to the brighter side, and life will become more joyful.
Here are 5 things you can immediately take control of with the power of your choice.
1. Taking personal responsibility
Taking responsibility for your actions means having the courage to own up to your past actions and the willingness to accept its consequences. It helps no one to continue playing the blame game. It will liberate you to see everything, including yourself, from a more neutral or positive perspective.
2. Change your attitude
Your attitude change will affect your life. When you shift your mindset, instead of accepting that life happens to you, you’ll appreciate that your life is how you perceive it to be. All it takes is just a decision to change the lens from which you view your world.
3. Your response or reaction to circumstances
Let’s face it. Sometimes life just plain sucks. What do you do? You can sulk all day or you can turn the situation around by deciding to focus on the good and positive. Even amid the gloom, there is always a glimpse of light. It’s hard not to get pulled down when you’re surrounded by negativity, but then again, it’s a choice you make. Only you can do that.
4. Willingness to adopt change
Changes of any kind require willingness. Often when we say we want to change, we are actually not ready to take the actions that are required for change. We end up procrastinating and getting deeper and deeper into despair. Willingness to let go and start over creates room for new possibilities and grant new perspectives to an otherwise hopeless situation.
Original Photo by Ashley Byrd on Unsplash
5. Hit the pause button
When life becomes overwhelming, take a time-out. Breathe. Find your center. Don’t react immediately because you are not in the right frame of mind. Avoid saying or doing something you might regret later. Take time to process your thoughts and re-address the issue at a later time.
Conclusion
Choices are a very personal thing. Each of us makes different choices and has to live with the consequences of those choices. What is right for you may not be the same for another. With every decision, you can choose the path that brings you closer to your best life, or keeps you stuck in your current one.
Be willing to be uncomfortable and do the hard work it requires so you can take back control and responsibility for how you decide your life to be.
Be exceptionally grateful that today is another day given to you to make all the choices you want.
